I was thinking yesterday about the progression of love. When Tom and I started dating, I was only sixteen and he was eighteen. He was a very mature, intense and serious eighteen year old. As mature as I was, I was never in love before . . . infatuated yes, love no. I remember Tom telling me he loved me for the first time. I looked at him and he was as serious as could be. I knew he meant it. For the first time in my short life I wanted to speak truth to this handsome young man with love in his eyes but not hurt his feelings. I said, “I like you very much.” It wasn’t exactly what he wanted to hear, but he took it. He didn’t give up. (If you haven’t read about how we met you can here and here.)
As time went on and I got to know Tom, I loved what I saw. I knew that this man loved me and I could honesty say it back to him. It took time for me to get to know him. It took trust for me to know that he wouldn’t hurt me. It took faith for me to come out and say it. He was such an intense young man and he knew he wanted to marry me. I was only seventeen at the time. I knew I loved him, but for the rest of my life . . . well that took some more time. It didn’t matter to him that I would turn him down daily . . . he was on a mission from God he would say. He knew in his heart that I was the girl God had for him.
As our lives became intertwined, I knew I wanted to share my life with him. The progression of time, trust, and love was necessary. It’s a decision I’ve never regretted. I knew God wanted us to be together and because of this we’re able to get through the hard times. That is when your love is tested, through hard times. It’s easy to love someone when all is right in the world. What happens when your trust is tested? What happens when disappointment enters the picture? What happens when you argue?
Too many people today give up on the progression of love. They just want the good times and forget their vows: in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health, for richer and for poorer. I love these traditional vows, there is power in them.
When I got home yesterday, my hubby sent me a link to a You Tube video of Faith Hill and Tim McGraw singing their song, I Need You. I’ve never heard the song before, but he didn’t send it to me because of the words of the song. He saw them singing while channel surfing and knew that I like them and their music. He knew that I love the way they look at each other because you can tell that they are in love. He sent it to me because he wanted me to know that he needs me and was thinking of me. He’s a romantic.
We’ve been together for over 29 years. I don’t remember things I did before him. We’ve been known to say, “Remember when we went to such and such a place?” The other’s response would be, “No that wasn’t me.” That still makes me laugh when it happens.
Love gets better with time like fine wine. It becomes richer, grows deeper and more passionate. Love has its ups and down no matter how well you get along. The thing to remember is not to stay in the bad places, but to try to resolve it and move on. Forgiveness the way God forgives is another (as far as the east is from the west He remembers our offense no more). It’s important to remember that love is a decision sometimes. I guess I could go on and on. There is so much to say about love. Remember don’t give up on love. Go and hug your loved one, tell them you love them, do something that is totally selfless for them.
Now go out on a date and stare into each other’s eyes. Have a great weekend.
© Nadine Z. 2007