Wednesday, February 20, 2008

The Fence

There are all types of fences, made of different types of materials. What they are made of depends on the purpose of their existence. Are they there to keep out the neighbor’s dog or a thief? Feeling safe and protected is important. How far you go with the fence depends on how safe you want to feel.

Maybe a fence is not enough. You build a wall made of brick. Still not enough? Install an alarm that rings into the local police station when someone passes the exterior wall. This can get quite expensive, but it’s worth it, isn’t it? I mean you can’t put a price on your peace of mind.

What if something goes horribly wrong and you trip off the alarm? The police call and can’t get through to you so they send a SWAT team to your home. They have trouble getting over the wall so they blow it up. The next thing you know you’re surrounded by guns and badges.

That was a silly scenario I know, but fences got me to thinking about internal fences. I’ve heard it said people build fences around their hearts because of offences. The type of fence and the thickness of it depends on how deeply the wound is. I know about fences around the heart. It’s something God has been dealing with me. I’ve asked Him to help me live a transformed life- more of Him, less of me. The moment I get hurt, I build another layer to my fence. This is something I’ve always done. It’s my defense mechanism. But that’s not living life with freedom and passion.

I’ve also heard it said that God will offend your mind to reveal your heart. What’s revealed when your mind is offended? I’m not talking about abuse here, but the things of life that hurt from people who we care about. The ones we call friend can hurt us more than anyone because we let them into our circle. It doesn’t take much to get offended or hurt. Many little offences build up over time if we don’t take of it. So what’s the solution - keep everyone out? I’ve tried that, it’s not good. Put an alarm around our heart when someone comes close it goes off. No, I’ve tried that too, it’s too noisy and ineffective.

God has been showing me the ways that I build in a negative way. It’s something He’s been working on for some time. I’m glad. It’s not an easy process, but it’s good. Fences belong outside the home and not inside. They definitely don’t have a place in the heart. So I’ve been giving God permission to tear down my fences. Whenever you give God permission to do something He goes for it.

Now my heart is freer to love.

© Nadine Z. 2008

21 comments:

Art said...

Interesting analogy... fences are seen by some as bad but by some as good. I think it depends on what the intent is but in general tearing them down is better than building them!

a woman who is said...

Great analogy. I find as long as I let God have access to my heart, He helps me with at least putting in some people friendly gates.

Susan said...

I was never very much of a fence builder. In addition I ran into this teaching about 10 years ago and it completely works for me: "If you CAN be offended, you WILL be offended." Now, if I get the slightest bit offended I think of this and realize it's all about me taking the offense and not about the other person.

This was a great post, Nadine. I'm glad you are making progress in this area of your life. It is so freeing!!!!
Susan

Scarlet said...

I think I have the exact opposite problem...I let everyone in. No fences.

It does hurt when someone you let into your circle lets you down, but I can't live with walls and fences.

It's so much worse when you hurt for being something you're not than when you hurt for being real.

The good news is that God is on our side, and there's no hurt too big that he can't heal.

Anonymous said...

awwwww don't tell me this lol... it hits too close to home; and i don't want to be convicted lol.. seriously though, an issue i've been dealing with as well!

eph2810 said...

Wow, Nadine...you don't know how much this post has spoken to me. I needed to read that. I have noticed that I have build a fence around my heart as of lately...I am not sure why. I will ask Him to chisel away my fence.

Blessings to you and yours this precious Thursday....

Shadraq said...

What happens when someone pees on your fence?

Shadraq said...

;) Kidding.

I enjoyed reading this. I went thru a time in my life where I had a big sign on my fence that said "F**k Off".

I'm sure you saw it.

Thankfully, you and Tom weren't put off by my sign. I'm a better man for it.

I love you,
Shadraq

Emancipation of the Freed said...

Nice post!

When someone pushes my buttons I've begun to ask myself this question... Why does the button even exist? If I didn't have the button in the first place, it couldn't be pushed... by anyone.

Love you,
Tom

Unknown said...

Fantastic bit of writing Na!

It's interesting that just when we think we've torn down all our fences we realize there are more! It's a process, isn't it?

It's good to have good friends along the way to help at least build a gate once in a while!

Dedee said...

I loved the post and I loved your dh's comment. I might have needed to hear that even more than the original post, although I needed that as well. Thanks for sharing.

Dawn said...

What good thoughts.

j said...

Nadine, I like the concept of living a transformed life. I build fences too and often times, if a relationship gets even a little rocky, I throw up a self protecting wall with Razor wire across the top! I'm glad you shared, it makes me feel better that someone else, especially as Godly as you, has to work at it too. Jen

Keshi said...

**I’ve also heard it said that God will offend your mind to reveal your heart

That Im sure of! Cos that happened to me.

Keshi.

Shionge said...

Nadine, I am a very sociable and positive person so I have lots of friends but once beaten twice shine, I will 'build my own fence' when someone hurts me badly.

Elle*Bee said...

Beautiful analogy.

Knitting Mania said...

So true...spoke volumes to my heart this morning.... :)

j said...

PLEASE COME BY MY SITE FOR AN URGENT PRAYER REQUEST!!! JEN

Louise said...

Great analogy! Well said, gets me thinking!

AudreyO said...

You are an excellent writer. What an interesting post and super analogy.

Knit-Wit said...

Hmmmm..... I have a few fences that I would like to keep up. Everytime I try taking them down, I get pelted.